Christina Jones
Doing Ethnography
Professor Morton
06 May 2020
Mother-Daughter Bonding Time Under Covid-19 Isolation
My mom and I have always been very close. She’s sort of like my mom and my best friend rolled into one. Since I was in eighth grade, one of our favorite ways to bond has been watching Korean dramas together. Cheesy? Definitely. Sweet? Also a definitely. My dad laughs at us because we can be seen first thing in the morning, or late at night, holding onto each other in suspense as we watch the male lead go in for a … hug! from his crush after courting her for what has in reality been close to nine hours (wow… nine hours that we will never get back, over a hug. But would we want these nine hours back? I wouldn’t; they were wonderful and they were spent with my mom.) → side note: yes, these shows tend to be quite heteronormative…
For more than a month now, my mom and I have been forced to be physically separate from one another. Because I still have Covid-19, I am still under strict isolation and am confined to my bedroom, my bathroom, and the living room. My lovely mom has allowed me free reign over the television and the couch, which I very much appreciate seeing as when I am at my sickest points during the day on any given day, one of the most soothing and mindless things that I can do is watch a good show.
I miss my mom so much. Sure, she is right here in the house with me, and she sits at a distance with a mask on so that we can talk (and I see her eyes twinkling as she smiles at me under the all-too-thick wad of seafoam green-colored fabric: a homemade mask mailed to us by a kind family friend), but it is not the same as being able to sit right beside her and hug her. When I am breathlessly watching a K drama, I cannot reach out and squeeze my mom’s hand for dear life like I usually can. I also can’t look at her with tears in my eyes from laughing so hard, and that takes the fun out of the viewing experience.
What we have begun doing this week, though, is that we watch things together on Netflix Party. My mom sits upstairs in her office and watches on her laptop while I watch on the television beneath her, and I get to hear her glorious, ringing laugh again. I join her soprano giggles with my alto chuckles and it feels as though all is resolved again. I get to iMessage her my reactions and gush to her about the main character’s new haircut, or about how we should go to “that” restaurant whenever the day comes that we get to visit Seoul, all while we are watching the show. I cannot physically speak much but texting allows me to chit-chat with her while we watch, just like I usually do.
I’ve seen it said many times on various social media platforms that we must not forget that we turned to artists for entertainment, peace, happiness, and a sense of normalcy during all of this and I couldn't agree more. I truly do not know what I would do in my feverish, semi-vegetative states, if I did not have these K dramas to watch. What is more, I must comment on my eternal gratitude for the connective powers of works of art. These K dramas have allowed me to spend quality time with my mom, to share laughs and tears with her, even when I have not been able to physically be with her.